The Sound of Pleasure

Remember the hushed make out sessions of your youth. Rarely did we allow ourselves to sound out our pleasure lest our parents would hear. For many people, not wanting others to hear any evidence of our intimate encounters still carries some left over shame that keeps a heavy lid on our ability to experience our own pleasure decades later. After our parents, it was the neighbors, after the neighbors, it was the kids.I am not talking about dirty words, although those certainly can ignite a passionate situation as well as clarify boundaries when necessary. Words come from the higher thinking function in our brains. Sounds of arousal like mmmmm, oooooh, and ahhhh actually help to turn the thinking brain off. Expressing your pleasure through your sound initiates from a much more primal place in your brain.Think about the last time you ate something profoundly delicious and the sound of ooh and ahhh just rushed out of you as the taste melted in your mouth. Allowing the sound to accompany the experience actually made the taste even better and the flavor more memorable. This goes double for an intimate experience allowing your sounds to accentuate the visceral pleasure makes the experience bigger and better.Adding the power of sound to lovemaking has some magical qualities too. Sound in most basic form carries resonance in our body and communicates that directly to the bodies nearby. Many meditation techniques are based in the practice of resonant chanting, which attunes the energy field and body rhythms connecting us to ourselves and each other.Connecting through sound frequency has the added benefit of turning off our critical minds. It is impossible to simultaneously express a deep ahhh and be thinking about your self doubts. The primal pleasure takes over and shuts off the ego part that is often trying to disrupt deep connection.There is little room for miscommunication with our true arousal sounds. In fact there may not be a more direct feedback mechanism to your partner when s/he finds the magic spot ! and hear s your voice raise an octave. Sound with out words invites your partner into they mystery of your arousal and in turn heats up their own arousal.Experiment with sounds in life. Try it with something delicious first and see if the taste isnt just a little bit better then find a time and space where you can let your sound lead you with your lover and prepared to be amazed how deeply you resonate in love.
Wendy Strgar, owner of Good Clean Love, is a loveologist who writes and lectures on Making Love Sustainable, a green philosophy of relationships which teaches the importance of valuing the renewable resources of love and family. Wendy helps couples tackle the questions and concerns of intimacy and relationships, providing honest answers and innovative advice. Wendy lives in Eugene, Oregon with her husband, a psychiatrist, and their four children ages 11-20.

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