To be attached to ones own happiness is a barrier to the true and perfect path. To cherish others is the source of every admirable quality known. TsongkhapaIn the workplace, we are dependent on each other to get the work done and must support each other in doing so. No one person can do it all, and our livelihood depends on the others. It doesnt mean you have to like or hang out with each other, but creating a work environment in which everyone gets along and supports the work being done is vital.In our tendency to see ourselves as separate from others, we overlook the struggles and mental sufferings of our co-workers. In a hostile environment, more than likely your co-workers outbursts have nothing at all to do with you, and are instead related to what is going on in their lives away from work. Your meditation practice can help you to see more clearly into the actions of your colleagues at work. It allows you to shift your perspective and consider
- How each person is unique and different.
- Whether they are happy with their job.
- Whether fear is driving their anger.
- What is happening in their home life.
Finally, remember that they are spiritual beings, just like you. Buddhist nun and author,
Pema Chodron writes about how we blame others based on our concepts of what is right or wrong. This erects a barrier that keeps us from communicating genuinely with others and not confronting our own culpability. We do this with our closest friends and family, with our government, with all kinds of things that we dont like about our associates or our society. Chodron says that blaming others is a very common, ancient, well-perfected device for trying to feel better. We are afraid to step forward and take responsibility for fear of feeling unstable and vulnerable. Blaming is a way to protect our heartswhat is soft and open and tender. Rather than own that pain, we scramble to find some comfortable ground.If you are embroiled in an antagonistic relationship wi! th a co- worker, make sure you take an honest look at how you are contributing to the conflict. The spiritual journey is not meant to be without bumps and mountains to climb. And just because you practice meditation doesnt mean that you wont experience conflict, anger, or resentment in your work or with your colleagues. On the contrary, conflict, anger, and resentment are the reality of human nature. It is how the mind handles these negative emotions that separates those who meditate from those who dont meditate. Meditation helps you to break the cycle of your mental afflictions and surrender your attachment to being controlled by your emotionsWhen difficulties present themselves, whether in the form of a co-worker, a boss, your spouse, or the barking dog next door, they are all opportunities to put into practice what we awaken to on the meditation cushion. Notice what happens when you actually give thanks for the challenge and open your heart to compassion, generosity, patience, tolerance, and loving kindness.
Delia Quigley is the Director of StillPoint Schoolhouse, where she teaches a holistic lifestyle based on her 28 years of study, experience and practice. She is the creator of the Body Rejuvenation Cleanse, Cooking the Basics, and Broken Bodies Yoga. Delia's credentials include author, holistic health counselor, natural foods chef, yoga instructor, energy therapist and public speaker. Follow Delia's blogs: brcleanse.blogspot.com and brokenbodiesyoga.wordpress.com. To view her website go to www.deliaquigley.com
